In this article, I will go through what things men do to show they’re not interested in. I describe 18 of the most reliable indicators a guy is NOT into you, including one in particular that you can be extremely confident to tell a guy who doesn’t like you.
Once you know the 18(and this one in particular) you’ll be able to relax knowing exactly what a man is feeling.
#18. You’re Not Special You’re not special.
More specifically, he treats you just like all the other girls in his life. There is nothing in his behavior toward you that stands out as different or makes you think that he may like you. Not a single thing.
If he’s treating you like everyone else, that probably means he looks as just someone else he knows. Sure, you hope he wants you. And, maybe it’s possible.
But it’s doubtful. Unless he’s completely clueless, if a guy is into you, there will be at least a few clear indicators that are exclusive to you.
Nope If a guy likes you then nothing will aggravate him more than seeing you all over, or even just talking to, another guy. This type of thing literally drives men crazy because they don’t want to deal with the stress of a new competitor getting in the way of winning their grand prize.
So, if you are talking to and touching Chad. But Zach looks like he’s unfazed or doesn’t seem to even notice.
That’s because Zach isn’t “after you” romantically. Now, if Zach were getting a little antsy and kept looking over at you and Chad, or even came up to join (end) the conversation. Then you have a positive id on your new love interest.
But unless that happens, don’t get your hopes up. He isn’t interested in dating you.
#16. No Outreach Program.
He never reaches out with calls or texts. Never initiate a conversation, equals never starting a relationship. If a guy likes you, he’ll put in the work. Your phone should light up like a Christmas tree. Or at least show signs of life once in a while.
Keep in mind that a single instance of a random text asking for information or a small favor does not defy this rule.
If he ignores you after he’s gotten what he wants, then you know he wasn’t striking up a conversation as an excuse to get close to you. So, if he is not reaching out, over, up, around, etc. If there is zero communication coming from his phone, you should zero in on someone else.
#15. The Girlfriend.
You didn’t just hear about his girlfriend without reason. He can probably sense your advances and interest and wants to make it clear that he is off-limits without being too blunt. What better way for him to do this than to bring up the fact, regularly, that he is taken? Bummer, I know. But it’s cool. So, be happy.
He might end up being a great one. And, maybe revisit the idea if you ever catch the news that their relationship has ended. Things could turn out differently the next time around.
#14. No Reply He never replies – ever.
If a guy is intimately interested in you, then he should jump for joy every time he gets your texts. And, of course, he will reply. Even if he plays the waiting game, and makes you sit tight for a few minutes before responding. He will reply. But, if the guy you like has left your, “Hey, what’s up?” hangin’- seven times in a row – you may want to dump his digits.
I mean, if you’re considering adding a “read receipt” tag to his texts, just in case. Then why bother? What’s it really mean if he gives in and answers your- twelfth text, anyway? Hint: absolutely nothing. Pity politeness at that point is pointless.
#13. Body Language.
You don’t have to be a CIA agent to notice and decipher some of the most basic body language cues. Try to catch if his feet are pointed away from you while the two of you are in a discussion. If yes, it’s a good sign that he wants to, and is planning on, making an escape.
Even more so if he is leaning away from you as if there is something important he has to attend to. Additionally, if his arms are crossed, that means that he’s creating a barrier between the two of you.
Consciously, or not, he is making an attempt at blocking you out. Ideally, you want him to be fully facing you, with his arms in a relaxed position.
Feet facing you are an excellent, reassuring bonus of his being attracted to you. Anything short should be taken as a red flag.
#12. Avoidance Issues Reality check – he’s avoiding you.
Why is it that every time you say, “Hi” he suddenly has to do something? Or glances at you and quickly switches his attention back to whatever he was previously doing? I can tell you exactly why. The simple fact is that he doesn’t like you, and doesn’t want to encourage your attempts at conversation.
If a guy does this once, there may be a legitimate underlying reason, such as something weighing on his mind or actual things he has to attend to. If this is the case, though, he will be sincerely apologetic.
If he is not, then you have a crush on a guy that is just not into you, might not like you, and does not want to date you.
#11. Complimentary Fish Food.
Still, hoping he’ll say something nice or compliment you? Sure, you could be dealing with a totally out of touch guy, who doesn’t adhere to (or have a clue about) social norms. But, there’s a greater chance that he simply doesn’t like you.
Your typical guy will feed you compliments on anything from the way you talk to the color of your shoes (even if he hates that color).
Why? Because that’s how guys tell you they like you, without going ‘all in’ and actually saying it. Unless you’re in the third grade. Then they just pull your pigtails or chase you on the playground.
Go figure. Anyway, guys know that girls love compliments. Consider the phrase, “fishing for compliments.” Based on this logic, if a guy likes you, he will cast compliments in your direction as if they were fistfuls of fish food. Hoping you’re as hungry as a school of Koi fish in a pond.
Take note, though. Is he throwing food at an entire school, hoping to catch one? If yes, don’t bite. You aren’t that hungry. In other words, if he’s just aiming to shoot fish in a barrel – dodge that bullet, baby.
#10. Curious George-Not!
Curiosity spells interest. (no dead cats here). You spend a decent amount of time around this guy, yet he has never asked about the smallest details of your life. Even though you droned on about it and you’ve been back for a week from your awesome vacation, you should know, he couldn’t care less; because he never bothered to ask about it.
If a guy treats your details as if you never even mentioned them, it’s because he not interested in you. You are not on his Dating Radar. Don’t expect a relationship to form with a guy who will not form a simple sentence, asking about your day.
#9. Closed Book Interrogation
Is he a closed book? Talking to this guy feels like being in a police interrogation. And you are the interrogator. When you ask him a question about his personal life, he all but pleads the fifth. Even if a guy isn’t the open-book type, he should still talk about life’s Insignificant details.
That’s called conversation. If, he wants a relationship with you, and wants you to be his girlfriend, anyway. If a guy really likes you, he will invest in you by talking to you on a personal level. But, if you’re considering ‘water-boarding’ techniques to get him to share; then close that book and ‘shelf’ him.
#8. F-Ex Factor
It’s never, EVER a good sign when the Ex is always brought into your convo. Besides just being annoying! It might mean his heart is still a goner. And, let’s face it. If he’s still into her, he won’t be into you.
Even if he wants to be with you, he can’t be. Not as long as the ‘ole ex-factor is still tugging his rope. Go find a man who’s living in the present. Not looking back to the past. You want a guy to look at you, and actually see you.
Not look at you, while daydreaming about her.
# 7. He Wants It Back
When a guy likes you, his natural instincts will be unleashed like a protective beast. He likely will turn into your ultimate protector and provider. So, if a guy ever asks for something back that he has leaned to you, he’s totally not into you. If he was, he wouldn’t have violated his natural instinct to provide. And, you would still have that pen he let you borrow.
So much for cherishing his cooties on that trinket. If he liked you, he would notice how happy you are to have it, and would have considered your feelings. When a guy asks for things back, he may even be letting you know that nothing of his is for the keeping. Not a pen, not a jacket, and certainly not his heart.
#6. Not His Problem
A sure sign that a guy doesn’t like you is if he expresses any unwillingness to help you out when you’re in need. This echoes the point that he would be going against his natural instincts to provide.
Let’s say, for example, you work together, and are in need of some minor, low-effort help on a task. You ask him to do this small favor for you, and he makes up an excuse as to why he can’t do it. Or worse, he flat out rejects your plea for help.
If he can’t help out with simple work tasks, how will respond to the future “honey-do” lists? If he’s a helper, he’s a keeper.
Who? He has a ton of friends, but for some reason, they are never introduced to you. Not even when you are in close proximity to them. Major red flag. You clearly are not viewed as important or relevant. If you were, he would feel the need to show you off, especially to his buddies.
Sometimes the easiest way to measure your significance is to count how many people he has introduced you to. If the number works out to, um, zero…move on. (another fish reference): There are too many fish in the sea to get caught up with one who won’t let you swim with his school.
#4. Girl Talk Girl talk.
No, not the keckling kind over an episode of The Bachelor. I mean that the guy you like, literally, talks to you about other girls; specifically, girls that he likes. Whether he’s asking what he should wear to a hot date tonight. Or if he is just telling you about an attractive girl he saw.
He’s doing one thing; making it painfully clear that he has other romantic interests. Don’t get upset, or feel like you need to compete with the competition.
It’s possible that there is no real competition. Or even a real another person. Instead, maybe he’s just trying to signal to you, gently, that he is not interested in starting a thing with you.
#2. Very Small Talk
If you’ve known this guy for a while, and your convos consist of simple chit chat. Chalk him up and chuck him. Despite your best conversational prowess, you can’t seem to get past the weather – again. It is another red flag indicating his lack of interest. If you’re starting to prefer a conversation with Siri, find another chat mate.
It’s possible that if he is around you regularly, he has proceeded to protest your interests in him, with an intense non-interest in conversations with you.
#1. Center of the HIS Universe
Wouldn’t it feel amazing to be the center of your crush’s Universe? Fat chance if there’s no room for you. In stark contrast to the very small talker, this guy talks about one thing and one thing only: himself! Not meant to impress you, either. Well, it is. But it shouldn’t. He talks about himself because his world revolves around him, himself, and him.
Whether the subject is the guy who cut him off this morning or the way he ties his shoes. Which, of course, is far superior to the way others tie their shoes.
This guy is what we refer to as a narcissist. He can’t be into you, because he can Only be into himself. Cut this guy, and anyone like him, out of your life. There are great guys who want to know, and actually care, about how You’re feeling and doing. So, if you’re feeling left-of-center around your crush, run off the stage, honey, because, as Yoda might advise, in his shadow, you will always be. Share that spotlight with No One, he will.