How to Avoid that Fatal Love

Everything Alison does revolves around her man Ken. She brags to everyone about Mr. Wonderful. Alison and her boyfriend attend Alison’s family reunion. She proudly talks about her relationship with the other women at the reunion. Everyone is excited about the special presentation for Alison’s grandparents. The program begins. Ken is restless and says, “Let’s leave. This is a big waste of my time.” Alison is upset and angry. They both leave. the first way to Avoid that Fatal Love is 


Like most people, you are probably interested in romance and the pursuit of true love. Do you anxiously await your chocolate candies and dozen roses from your favorite beau? Many people search for that special love, maybe at too great a cost. This is what we call Fatal Love. These words may seem contradictory until you look beneath the surface of some relationships. You may be unwilling to acknowledge it in your own relationship, but can you see it in others? You can find it all around you. Do you remember his words? “If I can’ t have you, no one can.” Those words sound haunting in a relationship. All Fatal Love does not have to encompass physical retribution. the second way to Avoid that Fatal Love is

Real Love

Love is a key element in a healthy relationship. Every Sunday morning I look forward to seeing a special couple at church. Although they have been married for over 30 years, they manage to keep a gleam in their eyes for each other. You can see them holding hands or sharing flirtatious smiles. This couple has an “addictive” love. What is love? At the basic level, the dictionary defines it as “a deep, tender feeling of affection toward a person; a feeling of intense desire and attraction toward a person.” When people discuss love, they also talk about affection and infatuation. These words don’t mean the same, however. Affection deals more with kind feelings toward someone, while infatuation is a foolish or unreasonable passion for a short duration. Although many find love to be most intense, real love is unselfish. Many people search for genuine love; however, some find themselves settling for cheaper versions. Solid relationships are built on real love. How does love become fatal? the third way to Avoid that Fatal Love is

Fake Love

All relationships are not founded on real love. In my own surroundings of family and friends, I observe the destruction of Fatal Love. Best-selling author Stephen Covey said, “The most important ingredient we put into any relationship is not what we say or what we do, but who we are. And if our words and our actions come from superficial human relations techniques (the Personality Ethic) rather than from our own inner core (the Character Ethic), others will sense that duplicity…” Fatal Love represents a one-sided and poisonous relationship. It is selfish. You see the signs and weep. You see her staying with this guy (and it can be a woman) no matter how bad she is treated. She won’t leave. You wonder why–is it fear, low self-esteem, or what? You worry and hope nothing else will happen. She may complain, but you know she will never leave. You figure it’s her nature. That’s her relationship, and you wonder if it’s really Fatal Love. Where will it all end? the last way to Avoid that Fatal Love is

Real Love Test

Can you determine if it’s your own relationship? Here are some questions to ask:

  •  Do you feel valued in your relationship?
  •  Do you have mutual respect for each other?
  •  Do you feel like you are being manipulated and controlled?
  •  Do you have the vision to demand more of your relationship?
  •  Can you find outside support for your relationship?


Real love is not perfect. In every relationship, there are hills and valleys to climb. Everyone deserves to be respected in a relationship; you shouldn’t need to settle to be happy. Having strong emotional feelings is only one part of the relationship equation; you need something more. One biblical verse sums love up the best, “Love is patient and kind; love is not jealous or boastful; it is not arrogant or rude.” Determine what type of relationship you have and decide what you really desire. If you can’t do it alone, get professional help. Talk with a minister or trusted friend to “get it off your chest.” True love is unselfish. Search it out. Start today and gain a better life.

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