How to Get Him to Commit?
How to Get Him to Commit? So you’re dating this guy and you’re really liking him it’s been a few months and things seem to be going really well but still, he hasn’t brought off the commitment talk.
you really don’t know what to think that’s right, you’re in a situation ship but you want to be in a relationship so what do you do.
in this article, I’m going to tell you the one thing, the one change you must make to get them to commit now no tricks, no schemes, no games, one thing you must don’t go anywhere we’re starting now.
hi everyone Am David this site is all about helping you build great relationships so you think we’re happy with the people you love so if you’re interested in making your love life the best part of your life start now by reading this in-depth article so you aren’t missing anything okay.
on to the steps to get him to commit in a previous article, we talked about situation ships and why they’re often a terrible idea if you remember a situation ship is basically a pseudo-relationship.
It’s an almost relationship you’re seeing a person regularly doing things that couples do including physical intimacy and sex but there’s no talk of commitment or relationship or exclusivity or future goals and this just continues lasting months and even years.
As I said before it’s okay to be in a situation ship if that’s what you want at the moment there’s nothing wrong with enjoying someone’s company and taking things slowly until you want to give them more but oftentimes women find themselves in a situation ship but they really want to be in a relationship a committed relationship.
if you spend enough time together that what are we conversation inevitably comes up and is met with I don’t want to be in a relationship I don’t want a commitment at this time why do we need labels you know you’ve probably heard all these excuses.
right so now what you like this person and you have a great time together you’re acting like a couple but they don’t want a commitment so what do you do.
I’m gonna share time-tested advice and suggestions that are sure to get your guide to commit and I’m saving the most important one for last because without doing the last one without making that last change the others won’t matter at all so make sure you get that one it’s absolutely essential before you start making any changes before you begin to ask yourself.
if this person is really relationship worthy ask yourself how much of my desire to be in a committed relationship is influenced by the fact that he doesn’t want one you know the classic we want what we can’t have to make sure that he’s capable of a relationship with emotional intimacy.
that he’s someone who values love and loyalty and mutual respect and the possibility of a future without these the relationship is nothing more than a casual thing that becomes disposable.
again is the situation ship really that good? are you really that compatible? do you share mutual respect and strong beliefs? can you see your self making long-term goals with this person?
if *yes* let’s go on so let’s assume that he’s not a player but rather he’s simply on the fence regarding being committed to you at this time and in this relationship so how do you get them to commit
1.stop talking about commitment.
the first thing you have to do is stop talking about commitment if you’ve already had this discussion and you’re on different pages of the book further discussing or trying to convince him of your point of view we’re likely backfired the more you talk about it the more pressure he will feel and that’s not a good thing he knows what you want.
every time you bring it up he pulls further and further away from you if you really want this guy to finally commit to being in an exclusive relationship you need to stop bringing up anything to do with the future or with the relationship altogether.
number two change your mindset
and keep things light and fun even though you’re disappointed by his lack of commitment you have to hide that disappointment and keep things light and fun and carefree you’ve got to be that person that he wants to be with most you’ve got to rock his world in a way that no one else can.
leave him wanting more leave him craving more and the only one that can satisfy that craving and that need is you so you must create that dynamic that feeling that he can’t get anywhere else
every time he thinks of you, he’s going to be thinking about the fun things he’s going to be associating you with everything fun not once.
But every time light fun easygoing confident not disappointed or frustrated or insecure about where things are going every time he thinks of you he’s going to be thinking about the fun things he’s going to associate you with everything fun.
number three prioritize your needs
put yourself first sometimes people go out of their way to show the person they’re dating how much they like them in doing so they feel like they don’t want to disappoint them they jump at every opportunity to hang out to talk or to text and usually that’s a good thing.
but not in situation ships in this case you need to take the attention off of him and put it back onto yourself take care of you first pick up some hobbies make and keep plans with your friends fill up your social calendar.
when he calls last minute to make plans oops sorry I have plans this will make him prioritize and plan his time with you and keep it mysterious you don’t have to tell him you’re going to dinner with your parents you’re just going to dinner see if he inquires about who you’re going with.
number four be mysterious
that means you don’t have to share every detail of your daily activities with him no need to over-explain every little thing you want him to wonder to develop intrigue so share bits and pieces of your life slowly make him earn your trust.
number five become scarce and less interested
this can be difficult to do because when you’d like someone you want to spend as much time with them as possible but that can often backfire think about the principle of scarcity things that are scarce are more valuable if your time is scarce it has more value plus absence makes the heart grow fonder.
don’t say out of sight out of mind he’s going to be wondering about you so let him have the thoughts that you’ve been having becoming scarce and less interested will only work if you’re able to pull off the first few steps of keeping things light fun and carefree.
if you no longer talk about commitment because when you pretend to be less interested following a disagreement or following the disappointing talk he will think it to mean that you’re upset or disappointed or angry.
maybe even pouting instead you become less interested combined with all of the above and he will fight harder to regain your attention and it’ll make him want to take things to the next level again put your needs first take some steps to take your mind off of what he’s doing or thinking.
get busy with your friends and work and school and hobbies and stuff contacting or responding like he’s your number one priority.
number six make him invest in you
people care more when they put more effort into their relationships So if you want your guide to committing you have to let him invest in you and I’m not talking about money.
I’m talking about allowing him to help you with things small favors like helping you complete a project at home or help with studying things let take time and effort the more he invests the more he will like you as a result.
I know it seems counterintuitive but trust me we appreciate and value the things that we work hard for remember the story of amber the one who over-invested and was taken for granted and eventually broken up with don’t be amber let him invest in you,
by the way have you been an amber situation or a similar one what was the outcome I’d love to hear your story take a moment and leave a comment below and let’s start a discussion it’s awesome when I see you guys supporting and encouraging one another in the comment section you might not even realize how much you can help someone with your words.
number seven keep your options open until your guy
finally realizes that you’re the girl for him keep dating other men keep your options open even if you’re not particularly interested in these other guys I mean don’t be obnoxious or in his face about it you don’t want to be accused of trying to make him jealous.
instead, keep your social calendar full of dates with others and you will be less worried about what your guy is doing he will definitely notice that you’re not as available as you once were and it will add just the right amount of anxiety to get him to take action before I get to the most important one.
the one that makes all the others work let me say this these suggestions aren’t anything that you haven’t heard before I mean do a google search and you will find countless articles and videos that essentially say the same thing to focus on you know your value.
make him work for it become less available keep your options open all of them are effective yet they can feel terrifying to implement yes all of them feel risky you’re fearing the worst thing that could have
that he becomes less interested that he will think that you’re cheating and you will lose him so you think it won’t work I should just be myself but these are all excuses driven by fear the fear of being rejected the fear that he won’t care and that he will walk away so the most important one.
number eight is to overcome your fear of being rejected
overcome your fear of the relationship ending because what’s the worst thing that could happen what’s going to happen if you get rejected is the world coming to an end are you gonna die nope it’s simply that their friendship is over and you are no longer dating.
and you will survive I mean how many years have you lived without this person in your life how long have you been dating three months six months a year what was your life like before you met Mr. wonderful has he been the reason that you’ve made.
thus far in life I know I’m being ridiculous but really rejection is a disappointment it’s a feeling and it hurts and you probably miss that person too you’ll miss the things that you did together okay that’s true but you must adopt the belief that if it’s meant to happen it will.
if you’re not compatible it’s not going to work out in the long run anyway rejection doesn’t mean there’s something wrong with you ever it only means that whatever we are asking for is not meant to happen at this time it does not mean we stop living or bury ourselves in a hole.
please please don’t ruminate about why or what he was thinking or is thinking you cannot mind read and you’ve not lived in his skin what you’re imagining could be completely untrue look if a relationship is meant to be if he’s the person for you if you’re really that compatible then implementing these suggestions will certainly bring him to want a commitment with you.
that’s for sure but if it’s not right if he’s not the right one for you if there are too many differences or if he’s not the committing type nothing you can do will change that outcome it just won’t work and that’s okay oh and yeah there are a few unintended consequences of these suggestions into your life.
along with the struggle in fear these suggestions will bring you to a healthier place and ready for the right relationship you become stronger and are able to overcome the peaks and valleys better with each lesson learned you become aware of what you want.
don’t want in a relationship and are able to make decisions based on what is best for .you it is very liberating and empowering to know that if one person rejects you that person was not really right.
If you would like to learn a method for triggering this special kind of intense attraction, watch the presentation prepared for you on What Men Secretly Want below.
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